America Has Spoken!
The winner in an 18-to-8 gallinaceous romp is: the WILD TURKEY.
If you did not get to cast your vote: there's still time! Our vote-tallying machines had a bit of difficulty counting all the hanging snoods. However, this is America, and like in any important election, we can tweak the voting totals to get exactly the outcome that we want. Or exactly the outcome we most fear.
Thanks for voting. Thanks for commenting. And thanks for being an American (or Canadian, or Peruvian, or [your nationality here]).