Monday, April 06, 2009

We Have a Winner!

Sorry... I think I just sharted.

Congratulations to HScott for his winning entry in the BOTB's Caption Contest #6.

Some other runners-up that also gave me a chuckle:

An ailing GM Corporation unveils the latest in "bailout" hood ornaments, in recognition of the American taxpayer.

Achoo! Ooops, it's awful getting old!2Stampis2B

Pull my feather!—Phil Kenny

Thanks to all who played. I hope you enjoy this as much as I do. One thing is for certain: We can all put Forster's tern on our Shart List.

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Thursday, April 02, 2009

Caption Contest #6

Mr. Forster would be appalled.

It's time once again for the Bill of the Birds Caption Contest. Send me your clever caption for the image above and you'll be entered in a competition to win an overwhelmingly wonderful prize.

Deadline for entries is Sunday, April 5. I will announce a winner on Monday, April 6. The prize is an autographed copy of The Young Birder's Guide. Un-autographed copies of this best-selling field guide sell for $15. Autographed, it's worth about half that...but hey! It's FREE!

Good luck! Keep looking up (and don't forget to close your mouth when you do.)

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Sunday, March 01, 2009

Caption Contest #5 Winner!

Although excellent birders, the Thompson family was still trying to get the hang of their new tabletop jigsaw.

Congratulations to CyberThrush for submitting the winning caption. But in my mind and heart, every ONE of you is a winner!

Also really funny:
"Whipple birders, can I get a "WHAT, WHAT, WHAT, WHAAAAAT!?"

Fo shizzle my bizzles. We be BIRDIN'! Word to your mother!

Patrick Belardo:
Whipple in the HIZ-OUSE!

Them Thompsons is hyper.

Heather & Dan:
This photo illustrates that after the economic downtown, the hand sign for "Live Free and Prosper" has declined by about 40%.

Some back story:
This photo was taken two springs ago, not far from Whipple, and shows 3 of the 4 core members of the Whipple Bird Club throwing down our birding gang sign. It's a W for Whipple.

I believe we'd just found a Kentucky warbler. The short birder in the front in Liam. Phoebe took the picture.

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Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Caption Contest #5

Your caption here.

It's the Bill of the Birds Caption Contest #5 and you, mi amigo, could be the LUCKY WINNER! The entrant who writes the winning caption will receive their choice of a year's subscription to Bird Watcher's Digest (a $20 value!) or $25 off an individual registration for the Midwest Birding Symposium (Yes, that's a $25 value for you math majors out there!)

Deadline for entries is midnight Saturday, February 28, 2009. The Caption Contest Awards Selection Executive Sub-committee will deliberate ad nauseum and will announce a winner Sunday morning, March 1, 2009.

Knock yer dang self out, people!

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Saturday, February 07, 2009

Caption Contest #4 Winner!

And the winner is:
Chris (no blog listed) who said...

If you can just replace that "S" with an "R", you've got yourself a sale!

Chris, I loved this one for its cleverness.
Please contact me at Bird Watcher's Digest to claim your prize.

Here are the runners-up, all of which made me laugh:
Julie Zickefoose

South's gonna do it agin.Delete


This should be a lot easier when they get that so-called Bird Atlas finished . .

Arj said...

The Mrs. is gonna be so proud that for once I did stop and ask for directions...

which resembled this fine entry:

Dubs said...

Must be a female wren; a male would never stop for directions


Non-migratory species can not rely on an innate sense of direction, but there are other ways....

elizabird said...

I am the Northern Wren.Thanks for playing, everyone!

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Thursday, February 05, 2009

Photo Caption Contest #4

Here is the latest image in need of your funny caption.

Deadline is Saturday, February 7, 2009 at noon. A winner will be announce shortly thereafter. Prize is a year's subscription to either Bird Watcher's Digest or The Backyard Birds Newsletter.

Please submit your entry using the Comment window below. Good luck!

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Monday, January 19, 2009

Caption Contest #3 Winners!

I have chosen a handful of excellent (IMHO) runners-up and a winner. I share them here with you, but I am happy to hear your rebuttals, rejoinders, praise and admonitions for these selections.

Just remember, here at Bill of the Birds EVERYONE is a winner.

Always carry a flask of whiskey in case of snakebite...and furthermore always carry a snake.—Kyle (no blog link listed on profile).


...and once its in the tube, you can massage it to get the oil out.


"Take me in oh tender woman
Take me in, for heaven's sake
Take me in oh tender BOTB," sighed the snake—by Rondeau Ric

"Let my people go, Pharoah, or so help me, I will throw this staff on the ground and you aren't gonna believe what will happen next!"—Eric (no blog link listed on profile).

After being released from the ER, Bill shaved the 'stache, sold the leather jacket, threw out the expired milk, and said good bye to "Rebel Bill" once and for all.—Dubs of Piffle

...don't tell me...let me guess...—Sylvia (no blog link listed on profile).

Thanks for playing to one and all! Shall we play this game some more?


Thursday, January 15, 2009

Caption Contest #3: The Back Story

Timber rattlesnake.

Last fall I was invited to speak at a wildlife diversity meeting sponsored by the Ohio Division of Wildlife at Shawnee State Forest in southern Ohio. One of our field trips involved going out with a rattlesnake expert who tracked timber rattlesnakes using radio telemetry. He had captured several rattlers and was fitting them with tiny tracking devices and releasing them. Before the snakes were set free, anyone who was interested got to hold one. The snakes were safely ensconced headfirst in a clear plastic tube. If you held the tail, they could not go forward through the tube, nor could they back out of the tube. It's about the safest way you could ever hold a venomous snake.

Venomous snakes give me the willies. It took every ounce of fortitude/turpitude/attitude/rectitude/stupitude to grasp the snake's tail and the tube and hold it for a few minutes. But I got-r-dun.

Thus, thanks to Shutterbug Science Chimp, we have a photo of me in a trancelike state, holding the snake tube.

Have at it, blogzillas. Please continue to post your captions here. The winner will be chosen on Monday, January 19. A fabulous prize will ensue.

Your caption here.

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Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Caption Contest #3

Your caption here.

Yes, that is a timber rattlesnake I am holding, halfway stuck into a tube. Yes, my eyes are closed. Yes, I have a mustache in this photo. I'll explain more tomorrow. For now, send in your clever captions, blogzillas. A fabulous prize to the winner!

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Sunday, December 28, 2008

Caption Contest #2 Winner!

with a nod to Monty Python:

"This goose is no more! He has ceased to be! If you hadn't nailed 'im to the perch, 'e'd be pushing up daisies! This is an EX-GOOSE!"


"Can I exchange this here? I requested a Cackling Goose."

Both of these entries (and several others) were sent in by KatDoc, who blogs here.

Also in the final round of chuckling were captions sent in by: Natural Moments, HoaryRedpoll, Jomo, and Kevbosnafu.

But ALL of the entries were clever and I thank you for taking time from your holidays to play this kooky game here at Bill of the Birds.

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Monday, December 22, 2008

Caption Contest #2

I hope you will forgive me for running another BOTB caption contest so soon after the last one, but here are my (rather feeble) reasons:

1. It's a short, holiday-filled week.
2. I have a pressing deadline.
3. The last BOTB caption contest was so much fun.
4. Holidays and a goose naturally go together.
5. I could NOT hide this amazing photo of Ohio birding icon Jim McCormac any longer.

Here's the rumpus:
Share your creative and funny caption with the rest of us via the Comments option below. The deadline for entries is 6 pm on Christmas Day (that's Thursday, December 25, FYI).

I will announce a winner on Boxing Day (Friday, December 26, 2008). The winner gets a year's subscription to Santa's favorite birding magazine, Bird Watcher's Digest.

Go in peace.

p.s. That's a barnacle goose (the one with the black neck).

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Friday, December 19, 2008

And We Have a Winner!

Winning Caption #1: Why should bowlers be the only ones with cool shoes?

Winning Caption #2: This is so Prez Bush can see them coming!

Congratulations to Virginia's own Alan Pulley, keeper of the Birds 'N Such blog, for his TWO winning entries!

Alan will receive a year's subscription to Bird Watcher's Digest as well as everlasting notoriety as the winner of this Bill of the Birds Photo Caption Contest.

A special thank you to all who entered. Choosing one winner was really tough. Also finishing in the top 5 were the following players: MikeMcD, jdr, OpposableChums, jomo, and Dubs. You can find their entries, along with all of the other captions submitted at this link.

Tune in next week for another round of caption-writing zaniness.

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Monday, December 15, 2008

Caption Contest

I am inviting all Bill of the Birds readers to write a funny caption for this photograph. I took this image in November on a birding field trip to The King Ranch in southern Texas.

Please submit your entry via the Comments posting option below. I will select a winner on Friday, December 19, 2008. Employees of BWD and members of my immediate family are only eligible if they submit their captions in person, written in Sharpie on the back of a $50 bill.

The winner will get a free one-year subscription to Bird Watcher's Digest (that's a $20 value!) for themselves, or to use as a gift for a fellow birder. Comments by Anonymous will have a hard time collecting the prize.

Good luck!


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Friday, November 14, 2008

Unheavy Friday

If this were one of those motivational business posters, the caption would probably read:
Every ascent has its perils.

I'd like to invite you, my creative bloggawkers, to contribute a caption for this photograph (forget the business/inspirational constraints).

Here's one to get you going:
"Dude! I can see your HOUSE from here!"

Got it? Fire at will.

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